"All Men Are Bastards" Knife Block

Beware bastards!

I think this could be an extremely dangerous product to humanity! somehow I think it will have a long term psychological effect!

Beware!

Godspeed!

Facing your fear

"An excellent animal," Wolf said, though without much enthusiasm, "but didn't anyone tell you it's customary to jump out of the way after the boar has been speared?"

"I didn't really think about it," Garion admitted, "but wouldn't that seem - well - cowardly?"

"Were you that concerned about what a pig might think of you?"

- Mister Wolf to Garion in "Pawn of Prophecy"

I think its goddamn funny. Indeed. Why would you be bothered with how a pig thinks of you, especially when you are hunting it for game or food. Bravery mixed in with dense wit seems like a good way to kill oneself.

So when I come face to face with a creature of my fear, I always wonder if I should apply the theory of 井水不犯河水 i.e. to say, the well water should not disturb the river water. Literally. Or another way of putting, everyone minds their own business. The policy of 它走它的陽光道,我過我的獨木橋 looks extremely attractive at time of facing the creature of my fear.

But there will be times when it come to a state of 背水一战, where I have to fight the battle, to win is honor and glory, and losing it will, well, not death but something similar to it. There is no running away. Its cowardly - but - why should I bother with what my creature of fear thinks of me?

Last night, it had broke the code of honor first. It trespass into my territory, and I caught it red-handed. There was no denial. There was not backup. There was no lie. There was only the truth, and the truth shall start my rampaging act against it. The battle horns had been blown. I had no choice but to gear myself up for the battle. Getting my weapons ready which I had stock up within reach in case of emergency when the dishonourable act of treason occurred.

Using the legendary and superb skill I seen, and tried to master, in 十面埋伏 to end the battle as decisively as I could. Rolling up my weapon of mass destruction that was extremely likely to conclude the battle, I took aim at the creature of my fear. I can see that it was try to stare back at me, trying to re-inject the fear into me. It even opened up its claws and waved them at me maliciously. But I rejected that fear, for the needs had arised for me to protect my territory. Its wings even started buzzing away, getting ready for an airborne attack. If it did, the creature would have taken the high ground leaving me disadvantagous. It might be a losing battle for me.

I know I had to strike the fear back into the creature instead. I had to stand firm and faced it bravely, but not densely. One do not thread in dangerous water, I must say. Somehow, somewhere, somewhat, something striked a fear in the creature. The buzzing of the wings stop. It turned around and ran. In any event of a battle, never ever show your back to your enemy. Honorable warriors do no death onto the enemy by way of kiling through the back. But when you are face one to one, in a one-on-one fight, no turning of the back for that is conclusion to the enemy to kill you, with or without honors for you have insulted the honors of the duel.

Such opportunity had occurred and I shall not waste it. Opportunity do not knock twice. I let flew my weapon of mass destruction. It wheez. It whooz. It flew straight into the creature. For that moment of a spilt nanosecond, I thought I saw it doing a couple of 360 degree rotations with abit of another 90 degree slate turn to the right before spearing crushing down on the lower half of the creature. In that moment of victory, I know the creature had taken a huge hit.

I walked up to it to ensure that it had been exterminated. Just when I thought of clearing up the corpus delicti to remove all traces of any form of termination that had taken place, the upper half of the carcass suddenly reacted with action of struggles. It was telling me that it was still alive, in pain maybe. Been a benevolent person and I hd a cleaning job to get over with, I had to will end it fugly life swiftly, to reduce the creature of any pain.

Taking aim with my weapon of mass destruction, I let flew it once more with the legendary and superb flying dagger style. Except this time, it got no rotation. It went straight down. Straight into its upper body. Straight to end the creature's miserable punny fugly life. C.R.A.S.H. And that the deed had been done, time for some prayers. Afterall, life sucks. Death is expected in a duel. So grudges should be hold against one another.

Amen.

南無阿弥陀佛

Allaahu Akba

For I know not your religion.

Farewell creature aka 小強 aka Kah Zua.

R.I.P

Inertia Drift

As a guy, I believe, I think, I see, I encounter talk-cock-sing-song sessions and most of them like to involve cars and soccers. Do a random sampling and you will probably find it so much easier to kick start a conversation on cars and soccers than anything else. Ok, do not pick specialised interest group. Then its an unfair sampling. And I simply know nothing about them. I know nothing about cars, all the more know nothing about driving (hey, I did mention I have no license, din I?).

Watch soccers only when I'm too bored or in some club drinking with some friends. Or maybe when I'm betting. Even then, watching soccer if you bet can gives you heart attack. Not a wise activites, I would say.

Got a message from a friend couple of days back saying about having extra tickets for the movie Initial D (頭文字), asking me with I have anyone in mind to bring along for the movie. I was like thinking har? what bring along? you mean I'm catching the movies with you people? how come I was not informed? Imagine the amount of questions that was going through my mind. No shit. Then I recalled someone organizing it. The person just say that another friend plan to block book the cinema for the show. No shit. I wonder where is he going to find 400 people to take up all the seats. Anyway, to show support, I told my friend to count me in for the show. And the conversation ended there with no followed up. Till I got the message as mention above. So I have to ask when is it since I recalled that I have agree to support.

Oh well, to help my friend, thought I should ask someone if she is interested. Well, not too bad. Lucky the show got Gay Jay Chou, if not I have to tell him to settle the tickets himself. My friend meant to say a block of tickets and not cinema. Else I wonder how is he going to swallow all the tickets.

I know about the existences of the movie. I know its based on the manga by Shuichi Shigeno (しげの 秀一), first published in 1995. I dun read it, or at least its not on my must-read list. 2 good reasons. I'm not big fan of cars/driving/racing and all the faces in the manga is fugly. In fact fugly might even be too kind a word. I tried and I give up. The sexist and cutest babe in the manga totally failed to seduce me.

Frankly, I have no idea why it is called Initial D. I never bother to find out. Then my date has to tell me what it means. How embarassing. She explained and I listened, and the show started. And then I forgotten. But I remember the explaining contain words like Drifting and Inertia.

Drifting is a variation of motorsports that originated in Japan. As opposed to most types of driving, which require a driver to reach a certain point first, or in the shortest amount of time to be declared the winner, drifting relies more on style than anything else. How far sideways you send the car, and how stylish in general your drift is, the better you score.

This type of driving has now migrated all over the world, and various organizations have begun to support it. Chances are if you live in any fairly large city, you can find a drift team or organization around yourself. The best part about it is that you don't need to be rich to compete. If you have a fairly well balanced car, you can do it. It just takes finesse with the controls and a feel for the car. Obviously RWD helps, but isn't neccesary. Due to the magic of the handbrake, even FF econoboxes can drift with some work.

I have stopped paying for tickets to watch any chinese movies in the cinema. I always feel its a total con of money. For the past few years, no chinese movies I catch is ever worth the moolah I paid for. But for this movie, I have no regrets. Although there are twists in the movies that do not match the actual manga, but it still follows the general idea.

You are either captivate by the racing/drifting scene or you are laughing your head off on the slapsticks. Pretty good combo for the movie. It felt like a two hour movie to me though in actual fact, it is less than that. Another thing, I like long movies. As a friend of mine would have put it make your moolah worth.

After the movie, the first thing that was racing through my mind is to cut the night short and go home to start o the anime. I have tons of them and have no goddamn time to do anything about it. Not to mention the piling mountains of manga and comics stack away in my cabinet. My mom been screaming at me that my place look like a warehouse (thank you mah, will consider tidying it up when I find that someone to do it for me).

I did. I did start on the anime and frankly, I still cannot accept their face. They are still fugly. And the other thing, the action in the movie gives you the realism that the anime can't give you. As the anime is heavily CG-ed, and at the time when the 1st Stage was done, CG is still not as exciting as what you are seeing now in Final Fantasy. Although half the realism is lost, but still, its a good anime to watch if you love stunts on your car.

Still, many of the terms still evades me. Damn. Watch one anime also gotta do study so many things. What drifting. What understeering. What FR. What FF. I say WTF!



I

What is your first impression

This simple test is technically for someone who can understand chinese. Translation can be done but with you have no clues with the chinese character, you are going to have a hard time understanding this.


给你做个心理测试,超准!
(Let me give you a psychological test. Amazingly accurate!)
"日"字加一笔,你第一感觉是什么字?
(Add a stroke to the 日 character, what is your first impression?)

.
..
...
....
.....
......
.......
........
.........
..........
...........
............
.............
..............
...............
................


白是最好的人;
(白 means you are a really nice person; did I heard someone saying Jackie)
目是最倔的人
(目means you are a tough person; you take no shit. probably also say you gonna be working ya arse off)
由是最善的人
(由 means you are a kind person; wow, that is nice. do i know you? im out of moolah)
电是最笨的人
(电 means you are a stupid person; dun look at me. I din invent this test)
旧是最毒的人
(旧 means you are a vicious person; poison ivy, i must say)
甲是最狠的人
(甲 means you are a ruthless person; are you some businessman or politician)
申是最猾的人
(申 means you are a sly person; aint you foxy)
旦是最懒的人
(旦 means you are a lazy person; are you reading this during office hour)
田是最想做爱的人
(田 means you are a person who is always wanting/looking/deprived of sex; hump hump hump the sheep)


What is my result? 田 is my first instinct. Followed by 旧 then 申. So I must be vicious and ruthless to conquer this world! But before that, let me have my sex first!!! Not my fault horrrrrrr......

True performance needs not companion

Sitting in the office listening to The Ten Tenors album, and its telling me something. I will regret not attend their performance when they are in town. Its good and lively. Simply by just listening to album, I can even feel the power of their singing. I'm sure it will be even more overwhelming if I'm there to listen in person. Damn.

Maybe like what someone who have convince ah lim that people don't get to interact during performances and concerts you don�t necessary need a companion when attending one. I think so too. Maybe I should just go alone and catch it if no khakis exist for one single outstanding performance. In fact I did ask the Miss Zero Libido but email gone missing and everything just vaporized, which is as usual.

Damn. Start counting my moolah for STOMP.

Appreciating it

孙子兵法曰：知已知彼，百战百胜

Uncle Sun says it that understand oneself and understand the enemy, every battle that one goes to, every battle will be victorious for one.

Technically, I'm not going to war but basically I'm just referring to the essence of it (hey, I'm a peace lover ^^\/). If you understand a particular subject/theme/object/watever, you can relate well and even come to put youself in the shoes, pondering what would be your action.

My fishes are friends, not food activity had been very enjoyable. And it was during the activity that I first hear, then followed by repeatedly hearing, the question. 40 metres, 30 bar, one tank left, what would you do? Actually I was think then that these are hardcore diving enthusiasts, asking such life-and-death question.

Probably if you are a none diver, you won't understand the question at all. I have known about Umizaru before it was released but it was not really on my must-watch list. It belongs to the catch-it-if-i-stumble-upon-it list. However, during the fishes are friends, not food activity, they kept talking about it. Must be exciting to get all these hardcore enthusiasts talking about it. Indeed, it does makes the differences if I have catch it before or after I took up diving. After I was watching the movie, I can feel the emotion building up, the hell they are doing and the question that the instructor kept asking.

An interesting movie but flawed. Would have prefer a much more dramatic ending. And I'm sure that I finished up all the credits only realise that at the end of it, there contain a trailer. A very short trailer on the upcoming part II. And the part II is slating for Spring 2006 release, which is like 1 ½ years away from the first part. Reminds me of the trailer for Matrix Revolution at the end of Matrix Reloaded credits.

Though I may not have learnt my tango, but my understanding of other dances does help me a lot in understanding some other dances. Of course my enjoyment for dancing as well as the talent in me (must be my self-inflated ego at work again) helping me enjoy my first paid tango performance. Till today, I have never regret it and I seriously love it. I still says it again, if I can catch it again, I would. But there are others who beg to differ. My friend simply puts it that he cannot appreciate anything he does not understand, even if he knows the subject's branch siblings.

I catch my first ballroom performance in an expensive paid dinner gala (expensive to me, you hor. I only earning little moolah to stay alive. I'm selling backside, anyone?) and that is even before I took up my ballroom classes. I have always love watching dance performance, except for ballet which I farking cannot understand, and some of those dizzling and blinding contemporary dance. I still enjoys it. Even now that I have learn my ballroom, still I cannot fully understand it but I'm very much enjoy watching it. Ballroom is much more different. They are like looking at perfectionist. It is so unlike social dancing. Easy come, easy go (errr, is that the right phrase?).

Come on, look at it this way, does all the food critics are good cook? I can be a good appreciator of good food. I can tell you the difference in the smoothness of the noodles, the feel in the texture and the just-about-right elastic feel of the noodles but that does makes me a good cook? Nop, it don't. How many of us here self-proclaim that they goes for good food, criticizing food that cannot make it yet can't cook a single shit?

My point? I have no idea. I just ranting away.

What shall I get?

The Spaniard give the regalo de bodas. The Italian give the regalo di nozze. The French have it with the cadeau de mariage. And me called it the wedding gift.

Was invited to a friend's solemnisation ceremony last Sunday. Frankly, this is the first time I'm invited to this kind of ceremony. I have siam a few in the past, or most of my close friends are still been single or I dunno where they disappear to.

And because the dinner does not take place at the same time as the ceremony, so I was a little lost on what to give, or even am I suppose to give. I get quite a fair bit of sms-es asking me what are we giving, or are we even giving anything (we are a bunch of salsa original kakis. original not I say one hor).

Technically, angpow (red packet) is a very much preferred choice of gift but then the dinner is coming up, and the angpow can be reserved for later usage. So a gift might be a better idea with a personal touch. So show how big a friend he is (hey, I we gotta burn some brain juice for idea).

So have a discussion with a friend on that matter.

½ a bitch: ask u... rom buy gifts or give angbao? cos he still got dinner later

me: ya not the first one to ask me that

me: and frankly, i really duno coz i neer attended soemthing like this before

me: either i siam them or i not invited

me: so this church thingy, [insert bridegroom's name]'s my first :-P

½ a bitch: i think a gift shared among us is good

me: yah yah, im thinking of that too

me: i wonder wat to buy for him

me: condom is a good idea?

½ a bitch: sex toys

½ a bitch: and some books on massages

½ a bitch: some nice shower and bubble bath thingy

me: i juz found out taht dildo is NOT cheap!

½ a bitch: dildo abit extreme lah... maybe just some nipple pincher or something can liao LOL

½ a bitch: or fluffy handcuffs

me: WAHAHAH

me: now, whose the kinky one

me: then get him the whip?

½ a bitch: some candles and amroma therpy shit

½ a bitch: think can get all these... quite fun also lah

½ a bitch: less serious

me: is [insert bridegroom's name] someone for aroma therapy? dun look like so

me: or we get him a massage for he and his wife?

me: some vouchers

½ a bitch: ya.. some spa thingy

Someone else email me this

3-kids mother suggest going to [insert place]...she say there

got sell kamasutra and foreplay board game.

We can buy him something naughty

My reply back

i went there that day for someone already! hahah

go there again?

there is only one [insert place] left there lor

and their things are not very attractive anymore.

and actually that was my initial idea!

and a dildo is EXPENSIVE

whip also not cheap.. and remember, the wife CANNOT get pregnant, else

he might be in for a HUGE headache

And the final reply come back as

Aiya...like tat just buy him a whole carton of condoms lor.

See, everyone is so kinky. I wonder how come our populations is still decreasing. And ain't we thought? Everyone chipping in on idea to get the loving couple. So how? Finally send out our representative to get the gift. bishamon is busy, filled to the brim with 3 appointments on the day of purchase, but hey, I did chip in my brain juice with all the information gather and gathering all the forces.

½ a bitch is the representative. She bought some bathing suit and dunno what <s>swimming</s> bubble bath stuff. And hell it is not cheap! But I'm sure they will have a kinky time. Wait, do they even have a bathtub to beginning with?

Why arts is expensive

I once told a friend that irregardless of the person religion in Sillypore, a sillyporean is always a sillyporean, by heart, by faith, by nature. The typical kiasu-ism exists in almost true blue well-bred sillyporean.

Company got a pretty good promotion price on the PCK musical, and I thought, why not? So I got myself a date (make myself happy abit, cannot anot?). Technical it should not be a date, but ended up she is the only person going, so it becomes a date. The rest are like not interested, finding it TOO expensive (wait till they check out Snow Wolf Lake), got a ticket already, heard that it is not good (only tell me this after I have ordered my ticket) etc. Nevermind that, let's hope the date ain't reading this else I might get chewed to death.

Found out that the PCK musical is actually given out a lot of promotion and discount to schools. In fact, some companies are even given free complimentary tickets. I guess when its at this stage, very likely that the tickets are not selling very well. On top of that, it is afterall a family targetted performance, so I guess I will be expected to see a lot of kids running around.

Indeed there is hell lotsa kids running around. And as usual, people like to be late, even for performances. Even 10 minutes into the performance, you can still see lotsa shadows moving around. I know, I should looking at the stage and not around other places but there are just a little too many shadows roaming around. Just like those hungry ghost during the Lunar 7th month, not like I seen any before.

When I found my seats, and lay my big fat bum on it, I know its not a good things already. Its creaky and because the whole roll of it are joined, any fidgeting can be well heard and well felt by  the next few seats beside it. Then came this bastard that was fidgeting so much that he must be sitting on needles throughout the whole damn performance. The girlfriend must be also cannot idiot. Can't she feel his beau fidgeting non stop? Can't she check on him or ask him to avoid fidgeting so much?

FARK. I tell you. Now there is a good reason why arts is expensive now. No noisy children. No uncomfortable seats. No farking bastard who do not know how to conduct himself. Oh, the sound system at the indoor stadium is not very good. Either I have not dig my ears well enough or the microphone that they are using sound muffled to me. And the only good thing I enjoy that night? The dinner. Nice sumptuous dinner. Too bad I can't get my date to foot the bill. Too bad.

Buy me a chio chio mei mei?

People used to tell me, oi go get youself a girlfriend or ask how is you and your girlfriend. I have to tell them I'm single and its not again. Does finding a girlfriend like doing to the market to do your marketing? Are they selling by the kg? Uncle, jit kilo lua juay lwee (how much is it per kilogram). Or package up easily for easy selling?

So I got tired and everytime I got people going to [insert country name], will always ask them to buy me a chio chio [insert country name]-nian/n/ese mei mei (cutie), if they are selling by the kilo. Sometimes I think its so much easy to go to mailorderbride.com or its similar shit helpful service for some ordering.

I remember once had this little conversation on mail-ordered bride. And they despite all those holy-shit arsehole who says that such things are the worst shit. -middle finger- Well, I always try to be very politically fair in my anzwering, that is to say, I can't give you an answer until it happens to me. And yeah, I say that maybe by the time I'm 40 and if I'm getting desperate, I will seriosuly consider that option. Till then, that option is locked up in the drawer.

A long time ago when the police are still wearing shorts, my good friend ask me about this particular friend of mine, that why am I not considering going after her. I gave this friend the look and ask him why does he suggest that? Well, he thinks we are pretty compatible and our mindset are pretty much alike. I was like WAT THE FARK? Since when am I ever on the same bandwidth with that person? Afterall, she's a friend that I know for a while, and I just think its safer to leave friends out of sex at certain point of time.

Not long later, some other friends tell me ask me the same thing. I was like why did you people even think that I will consider her? Afterall a while, I have to list out all the impossible reasons. Afterall, I think its just not quite right due to too many reasons.

I seriously do not think me and her mindset are similar. She's probably thinking of me as been too childish, as many people does. But I always tell them, this world is insane and serious enough, adding another serious person will not make life any easier. So I always choose to be the fools and entertain others. Laughter is a good medicine, didn't everyone or is it someone telling me that? When the time comes for me to get serious, I will and I have proven my case to the others.

She is a practical person who goes for stability and hell I have nothing. Anything less than five figure a month is just barely surviving. I can't see why some people see me as high income earner but I swear I am not. I just don't restricts my spending on food like I do enjoy good food unless its really taht exorbitant that I really just not so willing to part with my moolah. Probably these people who see how much of a miser I'm on clothings, unless and of couse I'm in for a retail therapy mood.

I am not tall, dark and handsome. I have no intention to lengthing myself though I read it somewhere that it is surgurically possible. I don't mind a bit of tan. I think its a healthy and sporty look. And I'm not talking about charred. I have no moolah for cosmetic surgury and looks are not forever. And I'm not blaming my parents. Afterall, beauty lies in the eyes of the beholder.

I have seen and come across friendship getting stained when a person is trying to get involved with someone else who is not interested. Best case scenario is taking it as if nothing happens and everything resume. Worst case scenario? I don't think I need to spell that out. So I just don't want to jeopardise a friendship, afteall we do have quite a few common friends and don't want things to turn awkward when going out with groups of common friends.

And importantly, I hate failure and disappointment. I know. Lack of confidence is already losing half the battle. They just say it that practice makes perfect and been thick-skin is one of the key factor in chasing the skirts. I guess I just don't have it.

And I have friends who seems to enjoy not accepting the fact that I have no gf? Or no one in mind? Or no one I'm actually persuing? Frankly, I think I'm always falling for people whom I have no chances with. Why? I have no goddamn idea why. And I'm always surrounded by people whom I might have a good chance with I take my shot at but just doesn't want to. Damn.

And now, to even think that friend is considerable? Has I been overwhelm by loneliness or what? Or I'm in denial? Did I choose to give up instead of facing failure? I just have to throw all these reasons at myself and stop thinking, things might juz ease off after a while. I guess. Beside, I think she is eying somebody whom she is denying it. Deny my foot.

A walk down memory lane II : i-n-t-e-r-n-e-t

Internet. The very thing that revolutionize the way you live now. In a developed urban city. 10 years ago, who will think of doing everything online? Most don't unless you have great foresight.

I remember my first taste of doing things online by calling into a Bulletin Board Service (BBS). At that time, it is the next best things you can get beside the Internet. Trying your best to level up at a popular BBS, so that you will have more time to download files uploaded by other people. Either upload files, donate moolah or try your best to know the operator of the BBS personally.

I remember back then, one of the more popular sites actually has 10 lines available for calling in. Imagine you are running a hobby and you gotta apply for 10 residence number? Its almost like those dial-up internet plan, where one gotta dial to a particular number to connect one-to-one. So on a good day, you can login real quick to your favourite BBS. If you are down on luck, you can be trying for days just to try to can connected to a BBS.

So back then, its very common to get a 2nd residence line. I had one too. If not I had to DC my line just to let my dad made his call. So just have to top up my own 2nd line. At least for a period of time, there seems to be some form of promotion going on. Even the local telcos were like convincing everyone to take up a 2nd residence line, but that is during the start of the dial-up internet.

By mid 90s, internet was finally catching on here. Everyone started to use it though you still do not find a lot of home users having an internet account. But most are already starting to surf the net, be it at school or work. Back then, a 14.4kbps is consider really fast! My first modem had a top speed of 9.6Kbps. That is good enough, back then. But not everyone had an email account. Its like when someone knew you have an email account, they will look at you like you are from some prestige club. Serious. Hey, we are students back then. Dun bug me if you are born with a silver spoon or your dad work in some bigarse company.

Before the existence of Hotmail (where it used to belong to this now-rich indian guy instead of Uncle Bill) and Yahoo, it could be quite a hoo-haa when you filled in the email field when literally most of your friends don't even know what is email then. But then slowly and not so steadily, more and more people were getting internet accounts at home or at least have some yahoo or hotmail email accounts. Then suddenly everyone was talking about email and I was like getting tired of it. I even stop asking people for email address, unless I think I want to email them anything.

And the first version of ICQ, the very greatdaddy of Instant Messenger (at least to me, and I dun care what you say about MSN or Yahoo or AOL), started arrived to you by the email. Its madness when you spend more than 30 minutes downloading 5 emails, which containing attachment of the ICQ installer. So its my first step into the digital world, identifying myself ICQ, but still, I'm already its 12XXXXth sign up. Kinda slow, ya think?

(This post been inside the draft for so long, and also telling myself to post shorter post. Friends bug me to write shorter post coz reading long post in the middle of the night is a bad thing. Probably will continue with a part II on this. haha)

Under-wat?

Got a regular newsletter from one of my subscriptions and the title goes Get Underwear with PHOTOi June Issue! as I read it with my sleepy eyes. And boy am I in for a little wake up shock. I know it cannot be a spam since I know where the email is coming from. And then the first thing that comes to my mind is that even magazine are giving out underwear with subscription?

Either I'm too deprived from sex or my eyes and brain are not working too well together. Late night sleeps are bad for health, I know but still, it also shows that age is catching up. Damn. Or I should just blame it on my running nose and winter season office environment these few days. And I still have a musical to catch tonight. I hope it is worth it, I hope. So far my favourite is still tango fire. With STOMP visiting us again, I guess time to spend moolah on the ticket. But first, must find kakis.

Ok, the actual title is Get Underwater with PHOTOi June Issue! after I decide to re-read it for the 3rd time.

Pink Nipple Cream

Was shopping around for some birdday presents and solemnisation gift, then come across this product, Pink Nipple Cream. WHAT THE FARK IS THAT FOR? Tell me what is real nowadays? The fetish for pink nipple? Ok, I guess pink nipple must be highly linked with innocence and virgin. In the same shop, I saw some shit on do-it-yourself for double eyelid and hell it look shitty to me. It shows a video of poking ya own eyelid inwards until it create a line, and that is when your got your double eyelid.

Think if they want to do better business, they should try to sell it to the sex industry. I believe it will move faster, sells better.

Try it. I think it might work. Let me know if it does. Then it might make a good kinky present for somebody. Oh, and dun ask who. I wonder if that makes a good solemnisation gift.

Oh, I think I prefer nice pinky nipples to dark look-like-overused nipples.

REALly ah?

Seems like our number 1 and ONLY 1 media station has finally done it again.

They have been switch from different media over the years since they launch their live radio. What the fark are they thinking again? Happy happy, change this, happy happy change that. Linkpoints website complaint about firefox been "old netscape" and insist that I upgrade my "netscape ". and refuse to work. NTUC comfort driving centre refuse to work well on firefox as well and gives crazy behaviour on IE. IRAS goddamn new efiling website gave me the weirdest problems that I have to randomly switch between my preferred firefox and forced to use IE to do my forced-to-do efiling.

Now you have to install REAL player to listen to mediacorp live radio. I always hate REAL player. Its a REAL pain-in-the-arse. It REALly screw up your computer badly. It comes with a lot of REAL shit. Lucky me, I have switch over to the real thing. Modern technology called it radio.

Frankly, I hate proprietary software and been trying a keen support of the open source. Though I am still using Windows, but anytime, i mean anytime soon or in the near future, I might just make up my mind and put the penguin at home. I always love the penguin, when it don't make me vomit blood.

Update(16/05) :
Manage to break it. Dun need to use real player to listen to it. Wanna put down the instruction here but a friend suggest a no-no. Come to think of it, dowan to be the next kuku to get sued by such petty real shit over something on my blog, unless I will get fame and moolah. Actually I prefer moolah. If I can do it, probably most of you can do it as well.

Let me give you a hint, google for something called real alternative. Oh, be warned, if you are behind corporate firewall, be prepare NOT get it.

Seeing the world

曰:读万卷书, 不如行万里路。
(reading 10 thousand rolls of scrolls cannot be compared with travelling 10 thousand miles)

曰:百闻不如一见
(seeing for oneself is a hundred times better than hearing from others)

You can read all the stories, you can view all pictures but nothing beats going there and seeing it with your very own eyes, and experiences the marvel of the places, the activities, the events.

When I first travelled on my own back 3 years ago, I tell myself that I will want to travel at least one a year, and to see as much of the world as I can. That is also the very first time I took the plane. Nothing exciting except trying to figure out how-where-when-why-who-what on your own. And most importantly, kept looking at my clock to ensure I dun miss my flight.

I wasn't born with a silver spoon and there is nothing I can complain about. Why should I be? If the poor can become the rich, the rich can become the powerful, I'm sure I can place myself somewhere in that hierarchy. And its always great and no guilt that you are spending your own moolah, and not wasting your parents' moolah. Beside, I dun have the luxury of wasting my parents' moolah.

I remember the time when I was supposed to go travel with some friends to phuket a few years back. After months of delaying and waiting, each one of the members dropped out for various reasons and finally, the last fella dropped out as well. I was upset and disappointed as well. All the talking and planning vapourized before me. So a colleague told me of a promotional airticket to Down Under, so off I went on my own.

The good thing of travelling alone and being single at the same time is that you do not need to give any commitment. No discussion to be carried out with a any SO, except with your boss to ensure he approve leaves. No fussing over who cannot do what or who dowan to do what. No more delaying as no one else to wait for. Almost no screw up, unless you screw yourself up. And its a really good thing to have someone, especially local, at the place of travel. Free lodging comes in handy if its available.

Happened that a friend was studying in the 2nd largest city in Down Under. So get my airticket and off I go to visit him. Ok, I din fly off immediately but the time taken to decide to go to holding the airticket in my hand was completed in 3 days. Chop chop get it done, chop chop go enjoy. So lucky me, I get to stay over at 2 friends' places, saving a fair bit of my travel.

Lately saw a promotional package to this history-rich island in a country of 13 thousand islands, probably the country with the most number of islands in the world. A place said to be one of the most expensive place in the country. An island said to be good for diving. Yeah, now whatever is in planning, diving has become an itineraries though it is not a must. So go around checking with my salsa-cum-diving kakis to see who wants to go, and the response take much longer than expected to come back. By the time the details are gathered, the good deal was no longer a good deal. A 4D/3N package had technically become a 2D/3N package. Last flight in and first flight out is no fun. Same moolah for a much lesser time there dun seems to look attactive those going. SoI had to go cancel the booking. Sadly.

Then now I saw another package to another island, in a country of 7 thousands islands. A deal so good that I can't really make it any cheaper if I go make the booking individually to avoid on my own, not with what they have to offer. So quickly, I go gather people, and this time, a smaller group and I want to have the answer by the next day. Good news is that I get all my details fast and bad news is that my room mate cannot make it. His leaves got disapproved. No shit. I seriously think the sway deity is clinging onto me.

Maybe its about time I go do my travelling alone. I always wonder how it is like to backpack alone. Maybe I should just do it. Maybe

The story of Creation

Creation Story

In the beginning, God created the Heavens and the Earth and populated the
Earth with broccoli, cauliflower and spinach, green and yellow and red
vegetables of all kinds, so Man and Woman would live long and healthy lives.

Then using God's great gifts, Satan created Ben and Jerry's Ice Cream and
Krispy Crème Donuts.And Satan said, 'You want chocolate with that'? And Man
said, 'Yes! Then Woman said, 'And as long as you're at it, add some
sprinkles'. And they gained 10 pounds. And Satan smiled.

Then God created healthful yogurt so Woman might keep the figure that Man
found so fair. And Satan brought forth white flour from the wheat, and
sugar from the cane and combined them. And Woman went from size 6 to size 14.

So God said,'Try my fresh green salad. And Satan presented
Thousand-Island Dressing, buttery croutons and garlic toast on the side.And
Man and Woman unfastened their belts following the repast.

God then said, 'I have sent you heart healthy vegetables and olive oil in
which to cook them.' And Satan brought forth deep fried fish and
chicken-fried steak so big it needed its own platter. And Man gained more
weight and his cholesterol went through the roof.

God then created a light, fluffy white cake, named it 'Angel Food Cake',
and said, 'It is good'.

Satan then created chocolate cake and named it 'Devil's Food'.

God then brought forth running shoes so that His children might lose those
extra pounds.

And Satan gave cable TV with a remote control so Man would not have to
toil changing the channels.And Man and Woman laughed and cried before the
flickering blue light and gained pounds.

Then God brought forth the potato, naturally low in fat and brimming with
nutrition. And Satan peeled off the healthful skin and sliced the starchy
center into chips and deep-fried them. And Man gained pounds.

God then gave lean beef so that Man might consume fewer calories and
still satisfy his appetite. And Satan created McDonald's and its 99-cent
double cheeseburger.Then said,'You want fries with that'? And Man replied,
'Yes'! 'And super size them'!

And Satan said,'It is good'. And Man went into cardiac arrest.God sighed
and created quadruple bypass surgery.Then Satan created HMOs.

Thought for the day:

There is more money being spent on breast implants and Viagra today than on
Alzheimer's research.This means that by 2040, there should be a large
elderly population with perky boobs and huge erections and absolutely no
recollection of what to do with them.

Life is precious, u knowwwww?

First I had this

me: when do u intend to finish up ya thesis?

me: oct, rite? if my goldfish memory remember correctly

godmom: if you value your life, you will never ask it again

me: ...........................................

me: I GOT THREATENED!

***me shut down all connection

Now this?

me: then u ask him if the [long hair ghost good friend] chio anot

me: look like goldfish anot

me: -ops-

long hair ghost: ...... u wanna die ah

You see, people are seeking donators for eggs. US$100000 for egg. £10000 for egg. See, life so precious! People are paying so much to have children, and here I have people threatening me with death threat?

I need moolah. Hobbies getting expensive. Anyone buying? Sperm for sales. Terms and condition applies.

Sigh. Life suuuxxxxxxxx

H2G2

British humour has always been one of my favorites. To top it up, british accent is just so sexy. Wait, that sound so gay. Still a british babe with a plain good british accent is just plain sexy. Period.

Coupling is a good one at its best, bester than Sex and The City, if you ask me. Then again, one man's meat is another man's poison, especially if you hate sitcom, then probably Sex and The City is more for you.

Been waiting for it for a while, since its a recommendation from a friend. Finally its showing in our sunny sillypore. Not too bad a movie, I must say. Take off your sensibility and sanity, leave them outside the cinema. Laugh your heart out. Depression is funny, if it is not on you.

H2G2 is a nice show that remains true blue to its origin. Many of the props in the movie reminds me very heavily of an 80s TV program. Afterall, it is based on an 80s program. Most of the things are not really reinvented for the new movie, maybe except Marvin (the old one here) and of course the Planet Factory. If this place ever existed, I would pray for the widest lens I can lay rob snatch steal whatever my hands on.

But of course, the movie is flawed. Moving a little too fast, and leaving behind many unanswered questions. Or maybe it was never meant to be answered. But still, someone who never watch the TV serial before can still enjoy the movie, someone like me.

A wallpaper that I used to use and always wonder the meaning behind it. Now I know where it originates from. A scene of hope and depression. Not to forget the scene of sexy Trillian and Marvin.

A quote from the ever depressing Marvin that might brighten up your day

Here I am with a brain the size of a planet and they ask me to pick up a piece of paper. Call that job satisfaction? I don't. (so honey, don't get so depressed over work. Afterall you just have to do it)

And I'm suspecting that this fella here is a brother to Marvin.

Wacking your boss

Stressup?

When? Why? How? Who? What?

No problem, wack your boss as much as you feel like it.

Wack all you want!

adventure cum treasure hunting cum ancient history

I'm such a sucker for stories or almost anything that is related to adventure cum treasure-hunting cum ancient history/relics/civilization.

Harrison Ford's Indiana Jones trilogy is good one. I love it. And after 15 years, they are making another sequel to it. So afterall, the last crusade is not exact the last crusade. But who cares, I will wait for it.

In recent time that my dear goldfish memory can recall, there's National Treasure. Its not as good but at least give me some time to kill. National Treasure was something close to Dan Brown's Da Vinci Code, touching on similar topic but not exactly there. And of coz I will be so waiting for the release of the movie. I hope I wont get disappointed. In fact, I always wonder why they never consider Angels and Demon first before filming Da Vinci Code. Maybe its plot that is too political on the religon? Then again, since when did ethnics ever pose as a problem for hollywood?

And of course there's silly but funny Sahara. Its not as ancient but still, its silly and funny and a fair bit of treasure hunting. I'm probably going to get bomb for saying this but I do enjoy a fair bit of Lora Croft 1 and 2. I know, its stupid, its mindless, its crap but hey, we haven't have a really decent treasure hunting cum adventure cum ancient shit for a long time. Hokkien has a saying boh herh hei mah hor (无鱼虾也好 which means when there's no fish, prawns will do fine). And I swear I'm watching for the thin as sheet plot, nothing to do with the 36C 36D. I swear! And beside, I'm no big fan of Angelina Jolie.

When you can get the satisfaction in movies, you wack on the novels. Beside Angels and Demon and Da Vinci Code
, there is Rule of Four referred to as the next Da Vinci Code. But I think so not. It is a class of its own, a unique way of telling the story, except its damn slow! That is my only complain, but its still is good. I'm almost done with the book. Almost, latest by tomorrow, I hope. I'm slow in my reading coz I mostly read while travelling, waiting for people who are late for appointment, and just before I sleep doze off. It still mostly done on travelling and worst, my travelling time are short in most cases, too short. Then again, its not worth it to increase my travelling time just so I can do my reading.

Did I mention that I hate travelling on the bus and train but love to travel to see the world.

Now I wonder what I should be starting next. More Dan Brown? David Eddings? Someone whom I have been dying to start his books since more than 10 years ago but never got the time to start it. Oh, ebook is the way to good. As long as I have my mobile, I can read. -smile-

ishuffle_tangent

After less than 6 months, finally the ripoff has arrive! So for those who love to have the design but refuse to pay the moolah. Here's something you can get!!!!